Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Back To Square One

I had two conversations with my attorney today, the first good, the second maddening. The first call went very well, she said that I could be finalized this month, which was amazing to me. She told me that my STBX wanted to file taxes jointly, which was also good news. I told her about the mediation session and she was happy to hear about that. We went over what the limits of a financial settlement would be for me - I'm willing to give up a lot just to get the ordeal over with, but I'm not willing to go further than a certain point. The basics are that I will give up all equity in the condo that I am entitled to (about $30,000) if she keeps all her debt (somewhere between $15-20,000). That has me on the losing end of $10-15,000, which I think is much more than fair. I got off the phone in a pretty good mood, feeling like maybe things would draw to a close. Ha.

I decided to call my attorney back because I thought of a question I had forgotten to ask her. It was only about an hour later, but what a difference! She had spoken with my STBX's attorney, and told me that:

  1. My STBX says that she has given me all the tax paperwork, and that I am procrastinating actually filing the taxes. I explained that I had asked for them (I later forwarded the email where I asked for them and my STBX's response) but had not yet been provided with them. My attorney told me that she insisted that she had given them to me.
  2. My STBX is again claiming that I am not paying her on time. I explained that I have actually paid early and made the extra effort to deposit it directly into her account. This is easy to prove - so I'm not worried at all. I have all the deposit slips, and of course the banks keep records.
  3. I am told that my STBX is disputing the accuracy of the mediation agreement that was sent to us by the mediators. She claims that it is different than what she agreed to. I'm not sure what this means, as there were no specifics.
  4. My STBX is again saying that the only fair financial settlement would be for me to take on ALL of the marital debt and for her to keep all of the marital assets.
  5. Finally, she is flatly denying that she cleaned out the bank accounts just before I was served and also flatly denying that she withdrew an extra $1000 later on. I had an idea on this. My thought is that we should accept her word on this and report the theft of the money to the police. It will be interesting to see her reaction if we do this.
By the end of the phone call my attorney was getting angry - she is as tired of the idiotic games as I am. She wants to have a meeting of us all next Friday, so I'm going to collect whatever financial paperwork I have proving my points.

I decided to take my match.com profile down for a little while. I can barely keep up with the email of the people I want to talk to, and I keep getting email from overseas, a lot of which is scammish. I'm looking forward to my date on Friday night - we have a great time hassling each other on the phone, so I think it'll be fun no matter what.