Friday, June 03, 2005

The Antics File

I was thinking about posting about all of the antics that have permeated this wonderful divorce, but realized that I’d be up to 3am again. So for now I’ll just catch up with what’s been happening lately.

Ok, several days ago I posted about how I found a ton (and it definitely could have weighed 2000 pounds, so no smartass comments!) of things moved out onto the parking lot of the condo. Her ultimatum: Take what you want, I’m throwing the rest out. I responded in the best way I could, taking what I could and taking pictures of the rest. I followed up with a voicemail later on, and an email. I also let her attorney know in a message. I knew that wouldn’t be the end of it, and I was right.

Two days ago (Wednesday) I received a call from my attorney, who is apparently still my attorney. She made it clear that she wanted money, but had to discuss some things. I found out that my STBX had moved my belongings back inside, despite her threat to throw it all out, and had thrown out all the stuff I agreed could be thrown out. Angered that she couldn’t control the issue, she decided to take a different tack. She called her attorney and said that she had been forced to put a bunch of her belongings under the deck in the back of the condo, and that the Condo Association had done an inspection. When they do an inspection and find something they don’t like, you will receive a letter outlining the problem and when to fix it to avoid being fined. It seemed to me that even if they happened to have an inspection scheduled for Monday, Tuesday would be an unbelievably fast turnaround to receive a letter. It would have had to have come on Tuesday because she had not received Wednesday’s mail when she called her attorney. I didn’t really believe that this was the case.

Also going on in this period of time – I was trying to get her to agree to let me have my son for the weekend so that I could take him up with me to my brother’s house. He and my sister-in-law have twin boys just 4 months younger than my son. My mother was visiting from Florida and it would be nice to have everybody together and to let the little guys play together. I voice-mailed her and emailed her about the weekend, but received no response. I called her on the morning my attorney called me and asked her about it, and she told me that she was driving and could not look at her schedule (although, in my head I thought it curious that I could hear Good Morning America), and that she’d get back to me. I think the only reason she answered the phone was that I blocked my phone number from showing up on caller id.

So my attorney tells me about the things under the deck and says that she’ll contact the STBX’s attorney about the weekend. He, apparently, thought it was a great idea, and said that he’d call her to see what she’d say. I think this is where the “talking to” comes in. I would have been very surprised if she just gave in and agreed to let me take him right off the bat.

Not too long after that I received a call from my attorney saying that the STBX had agreed to let me take my son for the weekend. My attorney wanted me to approach her about a four-way meeting and suggest a day to go and pickup the rest of my belongings. I had to provide her with a list of the things I wanted, which is a bit difficult since it’s been so long since I’ve been in the condo. I did the best I could, but there is surely a lot that was not covered.

I wrote yesterday about bringing my son back and finding nothing under the deck – except for the deck furniture, which could have gone up on the deck instead of under it. I’ll be posting a picture of that in a minute. I can’t help but think how much that it cost the two of us in legal fees for her to make this up and have the attorney’s get involved.

In her defense, I have to admit that my STBX has made a slight move towards compromise. Her original position was that I should take all of the debt and she should get all of the assets. To be more specific, she wanted me to take on all of her credit card debt as well as mine, and she wanted all of the equity in the condo. She claims I am not entitled to any of the equity, and her claims as to why that is have been pretty interesting. She made up a story that she had supported me for 7 months at the beginning of our relationship – a total falsehood. She also made a claim the other day that I had been unemployed for several months during that period – another lie. She also told her attorney that she had information that I had not been laid off, but in fact had been fired from my job for abuse of my corporate credit card. Of all her stories I felt that this one was the true prize winner.

What does she hope to gain out of all of this? Money. Money has always been her biggest issue, what she worries about the most. I’ve been told by the mutual friend that has kept me so well informed that my STBX had the idea at the beginning of everything that I was going to end up paying her a significant amount of money in alimony. She was apparently dismayed to find out that she wasn’t entitled to very much, if any, alimony. She’s continually tried to convince me to give her extra money for various things, implying that since our son would benefit I would be a bad parent if I didn’t give her the money.

One last thing – I received a message from my attorney today. She said that a four-way meeting had been set up for the 8th. I can hardly wait – I’m going to have my pictures of the deck – which I’ve decided to keep to myself until the meeting. I’m also going to prepare for confronting her about the money she’s taken. She cleaned out the checking and savings accounts literally two hours before I was served, which violated the divorce orders (they applied to me from the moment I was served, but to her from the moment she filed them, days before) and the extra $1000 she stole months later. She claims she took none of it, that it was me. I’ve decided that if she wants to claim she didn’t take it then I’ll have to contact the police – if she didn’t take it, then somebody stole a whole lot of money from us, and I want to report the crime.

So, there’s some of the Antics – isn’t this just too much fun?