Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Love Me For My Remote Controls, Baby

Somebody, who shall remain nameless for the moment, thinks I am sexy because of the number of remote controls I have. Put aside your suspicions that she is a man, although I will admit that I would have thought the same thing at first. We were talking by IM last night (which is something I have never really done until recently) and I had finally installed a webcam that was given to me by a company I worked for about 5 years ago. It’s a quality webcam – I am positively “green” with envy on the screen, possibly because her webcam was in “this-dimension-color”.

So the talk somehow turned to remotes, and how nice it would be if the buttons really worked, say, in bed. When put into that context, the buttons on my remote have so many interesting functions.

I have:

The Play, Fast Forward, and Record buttons – all perennial favorites of men.

The Slow (as in: Slow Down), Pause and Rewind buttons – buttons women wished were perennial favorites of men.

The “Thumbs-up” and “Thumbs-down” buttons – throw ambiguity out the window (yes, there’s a window button)

Her favorite, The Do-Over button, which goes back 7 seconds in time.

My personal favorites, the Guide button (for those times I have no idea what I’m doing) and the Info button to provide me with any needed information.

And that’s just my Tivo remote.

This conversation could not have happened if she did not have the same kind of sense of humor that I have: slightly disturbed. She may be slightly disturbed in other ways: she drinks skim milk. As we all know, this is a sign of some serious issues.

She told me yesterday that she is coming to Boston on a business trip, so we may actually end up meeting! She will be the first person I have (knowingly) met from the “Blogosphere” (where did they come up with that word, anyway?).

I have not been completely honest with her, however. I sent her my picture (see post above this one), but I really look more like the picture above that. I also told her I was about 5’ 6” tall, when in reality, I’m 3’ 11”. Do you think she’ll notice?